Save Your Marriage

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Oct
01

We nearly derailed ourselves

What happened next is one example of the law of unintended consequences.

We kept being asked to teach what we were learning and we might have continued to have quiet psychotherapy and training business, but it would’ve stopped there:

— if it had not been for accidentally getting entangled in a process where we both learned a huge amount about business and leadership

— stumbled headlong back into our own codependency issues 

— and I got so depressed I felt compelled to risk destroying both our business and our marriage before we managed to get back on track.

I wrote about that in some detail in "What Is The Emperor Wearing? Truth-Telling in Business Relationships" and "The Integrity Course." But that was many years later, after the success of three books on psychotherapy and personal development. They are described at www.EmpowermentSystems.com/publications

We tested our relationship by writing one of those books (Recovery From CoDependency: It’s Never Too Late to Reclaim Your Childhood) together and learned more about how our radically different personal styles are almost completely the opposite of traditional social roles.

You can probably see why I feel like we have so much to share.

And we’ve shared it in all kinds of ways in the past — even though so much comes out under just my name, we are definitely still partners.

We use just my name because five years ago, as we were getting deeper into this Internet world, our coach advised us that Internet users are more responsive to women.  He told us to put my face and name forward even though Jonathan and I had been business partners for over 30 years.

Now I’m not so sure that really was a good idea.  It’s true that I am the writer and I like more people contact than he does, but what’s also true is that we’ve been in this together for a long time

He is a fabulous therapist, coach and teacher also and over the past few years he has become the IT department as well.  He provides office support and runs the business details so I’m free to be creative.

We actually stopped doing our groups together in Y2K.  That seems just yesterday.  But since then his technical skills have allowed us to make much of our material available online.

One of the ways we’ve decided to celebrate this special anniversary is to make the Being Happy Program available to you. We want to help you have a satisfying, loving and lasting relationship too.

Yes I wrote the program, but it’s really about what we have learned to do to help our clients and to make our own relationship work in our 50 years together.

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